DiversityInc - March 2007

How Joe Biden

Blew It

Q: Does diversity stop after office hours? I am wondering about the composition of your social circle after corporate hours. Is your partner and cofounder on the same “wave frame”? What is your social mobility after office hours? Diversity is not only whatever they are, but also WHEREVER they are.

A: In my opinion, you’re touching on a major problem in our society. For most Americans, diversity is a workplace experience. We typically don’t socialize outside our cultural circles and those are traditionally drawn along racial lines.

There is evidence that the growth of people of color as a percent of our population is changing this. For example, 22 percent of American families have a biracial component—more than 5. 5 million Americans describe themselves as biracial (there had to be some level of interracial socialization to accomplish that!)

Another aspect of socialization is with GLBT people. I recently had dinner with a gay man who is living in a suburban house with his partner in a small southern city. He told me that most of his neighbors told him that they had never socialized with a gay couple before. Interestingly enough, he was recently asked why he wasn’t married (to his partner)—he had to explain that it wasn’t legal in that state. His straight neighbors were shocked at how unfair that was.

I don’t know how they felt before they got to know and care for their gay neighbors, but I’d bet their opin-

In what has become the most popular area of DiversityInc.com, Luke Visconti offers readers the opportunity to confidentially ask questions regarding diversity. You can find all questions and answers at www.DiversityInc.com/ATWG. Luke is one of two business partners who own and run DiversityInc. He directs all editorial and circulation functions.

ion was changed by socialization—their state is very conservative and on its way to passing a constitutional ban on gay marriage.

A lack of socialization can be very detrimental to a person’s career. For example, Sen. Joe Biden clearly doesn’t have many close black friends or he would have known that “articulate and clean” black people aren’t rare and the description isn’t complimentary. I’m sure he and many other white people in this country are still scratching their heads over the reaction he received.

To answer your question, my business partner and I have very diverse work and social lives. After 14 years of being business partners, we still socialize together, but not that often, so we have separate and diverse social circles, including GLBT people. I would say that our friends have more sophisticated social expectations in regards to diversity too. We also both have biracial families. It is very rare for either of us to be in a room with no diversity.

Q: Suppose someone possesses some of the s tereotypes that are attached to their race, gender, orientation, ability and/or age. Do you think this person should embrace or deny these qualities, especially regarding perpetuating stereotypes and advancing in careers?

A: Stereotypes are used to fit people into limitations comprehensible to the majority culture. Small-minded people cling to them as a means to make the large world digestible to their limited perspective. Even stereotypes that might seem somewhat positive—the “studious Asian,” for example—end up being self limiting: “studious but not leadership material.”

If you’re in an environment where the leadership embraces stereotypes, playing into that will only lead you down a cul-de-sac. If you have the means to leave, I suggest you do so—even if you’re a straight, able-bodied white man. Retro environments bring retro results.

If you’re in a progressive environment, playing into a stereotype is probably not going to mesh well with what the leadership is trying to accomplish.